the hedges and the hibiscus (ivorymittens) wrote,
the hedges and the hibiscus

well, christopher and i are no more.

it hurts less than it did last time. i haven't even really cried yet. it was on wednesday. though i cried a lot on tuesday because i think i kind of knew. he was ignoring me. not answering his phone. so i just went to his house and he broke up with me.

i think that each time that happens he takes away some part of my ability to really let myself go and really love somebody. i don't know how i am going to love again. i'm not deluding myself, but he was my big love and i won't meet somebody who makes me feel that way again. even though i'm just numb to it this time around. i've turned myself off.

immediately after he broke up with me i called max. an hour or two later we were in bed together. these things aren't all bad. it helped me feel attractive and wanted for a while and it was good and fun.

melbourne on the weekend. okkervil river and the lucksmiths. the lucksmiths were adorable and okkervil river were spine-tinglingly amazing. is it.
  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.